Lesson #1: It doesn't matter if others accept me.
Some chase self-acceptance by looking outward instead of inward.
But I spent a lot of my younger years comparing myself to others. It wasn't a conscious thought process. I know that I felt that if I was more like those people who seemed to "have it all", then I would be satisfied with myself.
I would be worthy of my own self-acceptance....but that's not true. I can fully accept myself no matter the opinions or thoughts of anyone else.
A hard lesson to learn.
Lesson #2: Self-acceptance does not require me to love all the things about myself.
Before I achieved self-acceptance, I thought the only way to get there was by
• loving my fat rolls
• embracing the way my legs look in skinny jeans
• being fine with the disproportionate dimensions of my body
None of these will ever happen.
Lesson #3: I don't have to do anything to earn or deserve my self-acceptance.
This was the hardest lesson to learn for 3 reasons:
• I only felt good about myself if I was doing things like losing weight, exercising hard, making more money, having a busy social life, etc.
• I live in a society that constantly reminds me that I'm not good enough.
• It's REALLY difficult to face my inner critic.
How did I get there?
I got brave. I decided to do the inner work on myself. Notice, I didn't say that I just decided to accept myself and it happened. That would be nice, right?
It's gradual. It's a rocky road with ups and downs, but eventually, you find more of the lush grass that feels amazing on your bare feet. You'll still feel the occasional pebble, and a rocky patch here or there, but you keep doing the inner work and those are less and less.
The good news is that you don't need anyone else's permission to get on that path to self-acceptance.
All it requires is a decision.
You can do this.
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